Lately I have felt an overwhelming sense of anxiety, and when I look at the world around me I see so much pain and sorrow and I can not help but become emotional. Amongst the sadness and the pain, I see so many lost people and lost souls, and I feel heartbroken and helpless. Today as I was running errands and feeling completely anxious and saddened, I heard these lyrics from the boys veggie tales worship CD...
"Heal my heart and make it clean
Open up my eyes to the things unseen
Show me how to love like You have loved me
Break my heart for what breaks Yours
Everything I am for Your Kingdom's cause
As I walk from earth into eternity"
Worship music truly ministers to my heart, and these lyrics were exactly what I needed to hear. It made me think of how brokenhearted Christ must be when He looks down on this earth. How much pain He must be feeling to see His people suffering. How sad He must be to see people deny Him, and turn their backs on Him and openly mock Him.
I often feel lost here on earth. Like a misfit, like I don't belong. Maybe it's because this is not my REAL home. So why do I get anxious about things going on around us, like earthquakes, tsunamis, tornadoes, kidnappings, murders, and illnesses? When I leave this earth, I will finally be home. I should not be worrying about something happening to my husband or children, because I know Heaven will be a much nicer home for them. I need to stop worrying and cast my cares on Jesus. I need to realize that Jesus can provide so much more for them then I can, and when He is ready to call me or a loved one home, I need to remember that He is simply calling us to our forever home, where we belong.
Easter Weekend
We had a wonderful weekend celebrating the resurrection of our Lord. After church, we headed to my sister's house to spend the day with them (after briefly stopping home for some pictures of my handsome crew). Dinner was delicious and the boys had a great time with their cousins.
I have some pictures of my precious family, so here they are...
Boogs
Nugget
K-man
Brothers
My handsome boys
My beautiful family
My boys with my niece and nephew
I will post another blog tomorrow, I am exhausted.
P.S...if anyone knows how to center my text, please let me know.
I have some pictures of my precious family, so here they are...
My beautiful family
I will post another blog tomorrow, I am exhausted.
P.S...if anyone knows how to center my text, please let me know.
Before the Morning
"Would you dare would you dare to believe
That you still have a reason to sing?
Cause the pain that you’vebeen feeling,
It can’t compare to the joy that’s coming.
So hold on you gotta wait for the light,
Press on and just fight the good fight,
Cause the pain that you’ve been feeling
It’s just the dark before the morning."
-Josh Wilson, "Before the Morning"
I was rocking the baby this morning when this song came on and it immediately brought tears to my eyes.
My first two pregnancy's were pretty smooth sailing. Yes, I had aches and pains, some morning sickness, and some complications along the way, but nothing that could prepare me for my pregnancy with K-man. We had been TTC and I was eagerly watching my calendar for when I could take a test. I still had several days to go before testing when I was laying in bed one night and suddenly I wasn't feeling too well. I ended up getting sick, and chalked it up to something I ate. The next two days, I got sick on and off and started thinking I was coming down with something. I still had a few days before I was able to test, but I decided to go for it anyway. So I ran out to walmart, got a test and there it was... two pink lines! I was ECSTATIC! But the sickness just got worse. It started before I was even 4 weeks pregnant and it lasted until the day my sweet baby boy was born. I knew it was pretty severe, and as the first trimester came and went and I was still throwing up 20 times a day and not even able to keep a popsicle down, I started feeling pretty down. It wasn't what I had imagined at all. The entire spring, summer and then fall came and went and I didn't even get to enjoy it with my boys.I could barely stand up without getting sick or passing out. I started feeling more and more depressed and just wondering when it would subside. During this time, I would just cry and listen to worship music, and hope to have a "good" day. I remember when I heard this song, the words just hit me and I sobbed and sobbed. I KNEW the "morning" was coming. I knew it would soon be a thing in the past, but at the time, the pain and discomfort was so real it seemed like the joy would never come. I probably listened to this song every day the rest of pregnancy (multiple times), just to get me through the day.
And then it came... The Morning! The day my K-man was born. When that song came on this morning and I was holding my sweet little K, the memories came rushing back. I just felt so overwhelmed by God's faithfulness. We have all had our "dark" times. I know in my life, there have been many of those dark times, but God has brought me through each and every one of them. I know there will be many more trials in my life, and I know there will be more tears and crying out to God, but I know that with those dark times, I can look forward to more "mornings", and more JOY! I hope that any of you who are going through a difficult time right now, are able to have your morning soon.
I am so thankful for my precious little K-man, and the loads of JOY he has brought to our family already!
That you still have a reason to sing?
Cause the pain that you’vebeen feeling,
It can’t compare to the joy that’s coming.
So hold on you gotta wait for the light,
Press on and just fight the good fight,
Cause the pain that you’ve been feeling
It’s just the dark before the morning."
-Josh Wilson, "Before the Morning"
I was rocking the baby this morning when this song came on and it immediately brought tears to my eyes.
My first two pregnancy's were pretty smooth sailing. Yes, I had aches and pains, some morning sickness, and some complications along the way, but nothing that could prepare me for my pregnancy with K-man. We had been TTC and I was eagerly watching my calendar for when I could take a test. I still had several days to go before testing when I was laying in bed one night and suddenly I wasn't feeling too well. I ended up getting sick, and chalked it up to something I ate. The next two days, I got sick on and off and started thinking I was coming down with something. I still had a few days before I was able to test, but I decided to go for it anyway. So I ran out to walmart, got a test and there it was... two pink lines! I was ECSTATIC! But the sickness just got worse. It started before I was even 4 weeks pregnant and it lasted until the day my sweet baby boy was born. I knew it was pretty severe, and as the first trimester came and went and I was still throwing up 20 times a day and not even able to keep a popsicle down, I started feeling pretty down. It wasn't what I had imagined at all. The entire spring, summer and then fall came and went and I didn't even get to enjoy it with my boys.I could barely stand up without getting sick or passing out. I started feeling more and more depressed and just wondering when it would subside. During this time, I would just cry and listen to worship music, and hope to have a "good" day. I remember when I heard this song, the words just hit me and I sobbed and sobbed. I KNEW the "morning" was coming. I knew it would soon be a thing in the past, but at the time, the pain and discomfort was so real it seemed like the joy would never come. I probably listened to this song every day the rest of pregnancy (multiple times), just to get me through the day.
And then it came... The Morning! The day my K-man was born. When that song came on this morning and I was holding my sweet little K, the memories came rushing back. I just felt so overwhelmed by God's faithfulness. We have all had our "dark" times. I know in my life, there have been many of those dark times, but God has brought me through each and every one of them. I know there will be many more trials in my life, and I know there will be more tears and crying out to God, but I know that with those dark times, I can look forward to more "mornings", and more JOY! I hope that any of you who are going through a difficult time right now, are able to have your morning soon.
I am so thankful for my precious little K-man, and the loads of JOY he has brought to our family already!
April Showers
My Sweet Boogs
Today was overcast/rainy but it looked beautiful outside, so I took Boogs out for a few quick photos. He is so fun, I just love him! I thought I would try out some fun edits :)
Today was overcast/rainy but it looked beautiful outside, so I took Boogs out for a few quick photos. He is so fun, I just love him! I thought I would try out some fun edits :)
Love Languages
So after talking to a dear friend of mine yesterday, I discovered a book called "The 5 love languages of children". I have previously read the original book on the 5 love languages, but until talking with Kasey yesterday, it never occured to me to try it with the boys. I think it will be wonderful and I am so excited to get the book. For those unfamiliar with the book, the 5 languages are as follows:
1. Words of Affirmation-
Actions don’t always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important—hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten.
2. Quality Time-
In the vernacular of Quality Time, nothing says, “I love you,” like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there—with the TV off, fork and knife down, and all chores and tasks on standby—makes your significant other feel truly special and loved. Distractions, postponed dates, or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful.
3. Receiving Gifts-
Don’t mistake this love language for materialism; the receiver of gifts thrives on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift. If you speak this language, the perfect gift or gesture shows that you are known, you are cared for, and you are prized above whatever was sacrificed to bring the gift to you. A missed birthday, anniversary, or a hasty, thoughtless gift would be disastrous—so would the absence of everyday gestures.
4. Acts of Service-
Can vacuuming the floors really be an expression of love? Absolutely! Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an “Acts of Service” person will speak volumes. The words he or she most want to hear: “Let me do that for you.” Laziness, broken commitments, and making more work for them tell speakers of this language their feelings don’t matter.
5. Physical Touch-
This language isn’t all about the bedroom. A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, holding hands, and thoughtful touches on the arm, shoulder, or face—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive.
(Information is from this website.... http://www.5lovelanguages.com/)
I believe all five of these are important in parent/child relationships (as well as marriage) but I think it's especially important to figure out which matters most to your child and spouse. Boogs main love language is "Words of Affirmation". I think this is why he is always so eager to dish out compliments for others. He is always telling me what a great mommy I am, how I make the best food, how much he loves being with me, how much he loves me, how much he loves his brothers, how thankful he is to Jesus. Him expressing these things is showing me how much he also likes to hear them. He is always asking me how he did drawing a picture, If I think he is talented, Do I think he looks handsome, ect,. "Physical Touch" is a close second for him. He loves hugs and kisses, cuddling, and being close to us. He loves wrestling with daddy and could snuggle on the couch with us for hours. Nugget is a "Quality Time" child. He loves spending time with each of us and has a blast doing things together. He brings me countless books throughout the day to read to him, and even though he is perfectly capable of going to the bathroom alone, he would much rather I go with him. I think one on one time is going to be extremely important for him. He is still a little young, so I think I will need to watch and see which languages are most important to him as he grows.
Once I receive and actually read the whole book, I will give you an update on how I enjoyed it.
1. Words of Affirmation-
Actions don’t always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important—hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten.
2. Quality Time-
In the vernacular of Quality Time, nothing says, “I love you,” like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there—with the TV off, fork and knife down, and all chores and tasks on standby—makes your significant other feel truly special and loved. Distractions, postponed dates, or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful.
3. Receiving Gifts-
Don’t mistake this love language for materialism; the receiver of gifts thrives on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift. If you speak this language, the perfect gift or gesture shows that you are known, you are cared for, and you are prized above whatever was sacrificed to bring the gift to you. A missed birthday, anniversary, or a hasty, thoughtless gift would be disastrous—so would the absence of everyday gestures.
4. Acts of Service-
Can vacuuming the floors really be an expression of love? Absolutely! Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an “Acts of Service” person will speak volumes. The words he or she most want to hear: “Let me do that for you.” Laziness, broken commitments, and making more work for them tell speakers of this language their feelings don’t matter.
5. Physical Touch-
This language isn’t all about the bedroom. A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, holding hands, and thoughtful touches on the arm, shoulder, or face—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive.
(Information is from this website.... http://www.5lovelanguages.com/)
I believe all five of these are important in parent/child relationships (as well as marriage) but I think it's especially important to figure out which matters most to your child and spouse. Boogs main love language is "Words of Affirmation". I think this is why he is always so eager to dish out compliments for others. He is always telling me what a great mommy I am, how I make the best food, how much he loves being with me, how much he loves me, how much he loves his brothers, how thankful he is to Jesus. Him expressing these things is showing me how much he also likes to hear them. He is always asking me how he did drawing a picture, If I think he is talented, Do I think he looks handsome, ect,. "Physical Touch" is a close second for him. He loves hugs and kisses, cuddling, and being close to us. He loves wrestling with daddy and could snuggle on the couch with us for hours. Nugget is a "Quality Time" child. He loves spending time with each of us and has a blast doing things together. He brings me countless books throughout the day to read to him, and even though he is perfectly capable of going to the bathroom alone, he would much rather I go with him. I think one on one time is going to be extremely important for him. He is still a little young, so I think I will need to watch and see which languages are most important to him as he grows.
Once I receive and actually read the whole book, I will give you an update on how I enjoyed it.
Easter is WHEN?
Boy did Easter sneak up on me. I have not gotten the boys outfits, nor have I had the chance to get them anything for Easter yet. I have been so busy getting everything ready for the photoshoot that I have a lot of catching up to do. My poor washing machine is going to be getting a serious workout this week. It is also that time of year for some spring cleaning to change out wardrobes and do some de-cluttering.
The Casting Call went wonderfully! I was so excited to see all the adorable children modeling the things I have been working so hard on. I thought it went well. I was lucky enough to have my sweet friend Jessi bring me donuts and a Coolata, which made my day. It is so nice to have thoughtful friends.
Today was our church Easter egg hunt, and with the weather on/off raining I didn't even get my camera out of the car. The boys had a wonderful time though, and I did as well.
I am not sure if I previously mentioned Boogs belly issues, but after talking in depth with his doctor we have decided to see an allergist and a GI specialist to see if we can figure out what is going on. The Doctor had wanted me to take him to see the allergist anyway in regards to getting his asthma better controlled. It's been flaring up really badly and he once again has a horrible cough. Poor boy just can't seem to catch a break.
I wanted to share a few of my favorite things I made for the casting call so here are a few pictures...
Ruffle Shirt
Another Ruffle Shirt
Grow With Me Dress (goes from Dress to Tank to Skirt)
Ruffle Pants
The Casting Call went wonderfully! I was so excited to see all the adorable children modeling the things I have been working so hard on. I thought it went well. I was lucky enough to have my sweet friend Jessi bring me donuts and a Coolata, which made my day. It is so nice to have thoughtful friends.
Today was our church Easter egg hunt, and with the weather on/off raining I didn't even get my camera out of the car. The boys had a wonderful time though, and I did as well.
I am not sure if I previously mentioned Boogs belly issues, but after talking in depth with his doctor we have decided to see an allergist and a GI specialist to see if we can figure out what is going on. The Doctor had wanted me to take him to see the allergist anyway in regards to getting his asthma better controlled. It's been flaring up really badly and he once again has a horrible cough. Poor boy just can't seem to catch a break.
I wanted to share a few of my favorite things I made for the casting call so here are a few pictures...
Ruffle Shirt
Another Ruffle Shirt
Grow With Me Dress (goes from Dress to Tank to Skirt)
Ruffle Pants
Sewing, sewing, sewing, and a playdate!
I am (mostly) really enjoying all the sewing I have been doing lately to get ready for the Photo shoot I am planning for thursday. It has been a lot of work, and finding the time is not always easy with 3 kids to care for. The hubby has been a great help when he gets home though, so I have had some time in the evenings to get some more done. I am very excited for the actual shoot so I can see how all my hard work has come together.
I took a much needed break today for a playdate with some friends. I had such a wonderful time connecting with other mom's and having some mama to mama talks. I had Boogs pretty young, and for a while I didn't have any friends with children, which led me to feel very alone. Now that I have friends who are also becoming parents, I have really been enjoying making new mom friends. I love the stage of life I am in. I often wish I could freeze time where I am now. Each one of my boys is at such a fun age. Boogs is so inquisitive, and I love listening to the questions he comes up with and seeing how incredible his little mind is. Nugget is holding conversations with me and turning more from toddler to preschooler and he just seems to be growing a mile a minute. K-man is in his sweet baby stage (although REALLY struggling with reflux) and I adore his little smiles and coos. I know God has so much more in store for my life though so I look forward to each new day.
I better get to bed so I can see what's in store for tomorrow ;).
I took a much needed break today for a playdate with some friends. I had such a wonderful time connecting with other mom's and having some mama to mama talks. I had Boogs pretty young, and for a while I didn't have any friends with children, which led me to feel very alone. Now that I have friends who are also becoming parents, I have really been enjoying making new mom friends. I love the stage of life I am in. I often wish I could freeze time where I am now. Each one of my boys is at such a fun age. Boogs is so inquisitive, and I love listening to the questions he comes up with and seeing how incredible his little mind is. Nugget is holding conversations with me and turning more from toddler to preschooler and he just seems to be growing a mile a minute. K-man is in his sweet baby stage (although REALLY struggling with reflux) and I adore his little smiles and coos. I know God has so much more in store for my life though so I look forward to each new day.
I better get to bed so I can see what's in store for tomorrow ;).
Internet free weekend!
Our internet is back up and running! A weekend without internet sure makes your appreciate it a lot more.
We had a good weekend. I got a surprise visit from my grandpa which really brightened my spirits. I love that man so much. He brought some donuts for the boys and I, and it brought back so many memories of him coming over when I was little and bringing me little treats. I always looked so forward to him coming over and remember running barefoot out to his van to greet him when he would come (and not just for the candy). I am such great memories of him and I cherish each and every one of them. I am so thrilled that K-man was born on my grandpa's birthday. I think it was a special gift from God to have him be born several weeks early on my grandpa's birthday. I could not have picked a better day for him to be born.
My weekend also included some sewing, a birthday party for my adorable niece and nephew, and some fellowship at church.
I have been getting some very severe migraines recently and the pain is just horrible. Yesterday, it got so intense I was vomiting and even laying in a dark and quiet room offered little relief. I think it's time to contact my neurologist and ask about a medication that is safe while nursing. Enough whining.
Today I have some more sewing to accomplish and I have some phone calls to make. Time to get on the ball!
We had a good weekend. I got a surprise visit from my grandpa which really brightened my spirits. I love that man so much. He brought some donuts for the boys and I, and it brought back so many memories of him coming over when I was little and bringing me little treats. I always looked so forward to him coming over and remember running barefoot out to his van to greet him when he would come (and not just for the candy). I am such great memories of him and I cherish each and every one of them. I am so thrilled that K-man was born on my grandpa's birthday. I think it was a special gift from God to have him be born several weeks early on my grandpa's birthday. I could not have picked a better day for him to be born.
My weekend also included some sewing, a birthday party for my adorable niece and nephew, and some fellowship at church.
I have been getting some very severe migraines recently and the pain is just horrible. Yesterday, it got so intense I was vomiting and even laying in a dark and quiet room offered little relief. I think it's time to contact my neurologist and ask about a medication that is safe while nursing. Enough whining.
Today I have some more sewing to accomplish and I have some phone calls to make. Time to get on the ball!
Where to begin?
I really want to get back into blogging. It was a huge part of my life during my pregnancy with Boogs and the first 2 years of his life. I love being able to go back and read through little memories. It's almost like an online scrapbook of our lives. I miss it, so I am giving it another go around. Life with 3 little boys can be challenging, but it is beyond fun, and I want to document it all. The good, the bad, the fun, the crazy ness, the joy, the sorrow, and the excitement.
So here I am, (debating whether here is spelled "hear" or "here"). Just one of the many signs of my recent sleep deprivation. I can't blame it on the baby. He is actually sleeping pretty well for the most part. Me, on the other hand, well I am a different story.
I am currently enjoying a little downtime between breakfast and lunch, snuggling K-man while his big brothers color. Today I have doctor appointments for K and Boogs. K has his 2 month well baby visit and I am excited to see how much he has grown since his arrival just a little over 2 months ago. Boogs is having a follow up to see how his new asthma medicine is working for him. Hopefully his lungs are improving and he is having an easier time breathing. The past week and a half or so, Boogs has been complaining of tummy aches and feeling sick quite often. He has not been eating near as much and has randomly thrown up a few different times. I have no idea what is going on, but I plan to bring it up to the doctor today and see what she thinks could be the problem. I am thinking keeping a food diary would be a good idea to see if I can narrow it down to something he is eating. Hopefully it ends soon.
My mind is running with things I need to accomplish this next week. Between birthday parties, playdates, doctors, sewing, photo shoots, cleaning and church, I don't foresee much free time. I am trying to find time to squeeze in workouts, but that can be difficult when cuddling a baby just is so much more appealing.
Well it's time to wrap it up. K is done nursing and it's time for showers and to get us all ready for the doctors. Have a wonderful weekend!
*edit*
Back from the doctors...
K-man (2 months)-11lbs 15oz * 23 1/2in.
Boogs (5yrs 4months)- 40.5lbs, he FINALLY hit 40lbs!
Nugget (2yrs 8 months)- 30.5lbs
So here I am, (debating whether here is spelled "hear" or "here"). Just one of the many signs of my recent sleep deprivation. I can't blame it on the baby. He is actually sleeping pretty well for the most part. Me, on the other hand, well I am a different story.
I am currently enjoying a little downtime between breakfast and lunch, snuggling K-man while his big brothers color. Today I have doctor appointments for K and Boogs. K has his 2 month well baby visit and I am excited to see how much he has grown since his arrival just a little over 2 months ago. Boogs is having a follow up to see how his new asthma medicine is working for him. Hopefully his lungs are improving and he is having an easier time breathing. The past week and a half or so, Boogs has been complaining of tummy aches and feeling sick quite often. He has not been eating near as much and has randomly thrown up a few different times. I have no idea what is going on, but I plan to bring it up to the doctor today and see what she thinks could be the problem. I am thinking keeping a food diary would be a good idea to see if I can narrow it down to something he is eating. Hopefully it ends soon.
My mind is running with things I need to accomplish this next week. Between birthday parties, playdates, doctors, sewing, photo shoots, cleaning and church, I don't foresee much free time. I am trying to find time to squeeze in workouts, but that can be difficult when cuddling a baby just is so much more appealing.
Well it's time to wrap it up. K is done nursing and it's time for showers and to get us all ready for the doctors. Have a wonderful weekend!
*edit*
Back from the doctors...
K-man (2 months)-11lbs 15oz * 23 1/2in.
Boogs (5yrs 4months)- 40.5lbs, he FINALLY hit 40lbs!
Nugget (2yrs 8 months)- 30.5lbs
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